Life - It Happens

Just over three years ago, I posted a semi-apologetic update of my previous year because I had neglected to write anything during that time.  However, it has now been three years since I last posted and I don't even feel guilty.  I don't feel guilty because I've been quite busy!

April 2013 - Brandon and I became foster parents to a relative's baby.  This was unexpected and we didn't have but a couple days to prepare.  He stayed with us for about six weeks before returning home.  Also, my nephew who was mentioned as likely to be a preemie was born completely healthy and only a couple days before his due date.

May 2013 - We got married!!  While on our honeymoon we only ate at new restaurants, watched new-to-us movies (it rained a lot), and enjoyed activities that at least one of us had never experienced, such as horseback riding (a first for him) and getting tattoos (a first for me).

May 2014 - We celebrated our one-year anniversary on a Friday and welcomed our son on Sunday!  It was an exhausting and exciting weekend for us!

May 2015 - A few days before our son's first birthday, I left my full-time job to make raising him a priority.  There have been hard days, of course, but he is so worth it.  I am very happy to be able to spend my days with this sweet, little miracle who adores me.

As you can imagine, becoming a mother has kept me quite busy, but today I finally got an opportunity while both husband and son were napping to sit down and start writing again.  I've been working on a book which I may or may not ever finish for many years now and also have decided to start writing about a new experience that I'm going through - gestational surrogacy.  Currently, I am 34 weeks pregnant with a healthy, strong boy who will travel home with his biological family once released from the hospital.  It's been an interesting journey thus far, but rewarding in that I know that I'm making the impossible possible for his mother.

Time Flies

  Wow!  It has been an amazingly long time since I last posted, and I would feel guilty if anyone besides Chelsea* actually read this blog on a semi-regular basis.  Because it has been over a year, I'll give you a timeline update.  Quick refresher: In November 2011, I met Brandon and he's part of the reason I stopped having as much time to write.

• February 2012 - I started working in a salaried Internet Sales Consultant position for a local car dealership.
• April 2012 - Painting became a new hobby that I have spent far too much money on.  It's a wonderful pastime for evenings of watching 'Buffy: The Vampire Slayer' while Brandon plays hockey.  I'll post some pictures soon (hopefully) of some of my creations.  So far, I'm playing it safe and sticking to landscapes and flowers.
• May 2012 - Brandon and I adopted a kitten, Salene, who has adapted well to living with the crazy dachshund babies, Ellie and Molly.

Salene, Molly, and Ellie having a snuggle while I painted.

• May 2012 - Brandon and I bought our first home together.  A big step toward being responsible adults!
• July 2012 - Brandon and I bought a new-to-us car and I bought my car (which was already mine) from my dad who had originally purchased it many years ago when I was 17.  So, now I'm 25 with a house, two cars, and various types of insurance, retirement plans, etc.  I suppose, I'm officially a grown-up.
• September 2012 - Brandon took me to Nashville.  I'd never been before, but will definitely be looking forward to going back!  We were planning to go to the Nashville Predators hockey game, but because the NHL was in lockout we ended up shopping, site seeing, and walking a lot.  Being the huge goober that I am, I wore my newish boots that I'd had only a couple weeks...this was a big mistake.  We walked more than two miles from Honky Tonk Central
  to The Parthenon.  My feet were rather angry with me.

• September 2012 - Brandon proposed!!  I was on the phone with my dad the evening after we returned from Nashville when I found my engagement ring hidden under my laptop.  Brandon knew I would come home and immediately get online, but he wasn't expecting me to be talking to my dad while this happened.  It was hilariously imperfect and wonderfully perfect at the same time.  I guess I should have known he was up to something when he so eagerly offered me a foot massage (which I did actually get after the proposal).
• November 2012 - My birthday came back around as it has a tendency to do.  I'm 25 now, so I feel like I'm not a kid anymore - even though I do still look 16-years-old.
• December 2012 - Brandon and I managed to both have four days off together for Christmas thanks to some schedule rearranging and a blizzard that trapped us in our house.  It made for a wonderful opportunity to watch all of the 'Harry Potter' movies and play NHL Monopoly which was Brandon's Christmas present from my dad.

  I have quite a lot to look forward to in the coming months, but I'll try to remember to post more than once per year.  I've been rather busy planning the wedding - even before the proposal we'd already decided on the date, venue, officiant, and DJ.  Here's a sneak peak into the next few months.

• In March, Brandon and I are headed to Chicago for a weekend hockey tournament.  I'll get to see the green river for St. Patrick's day!  I'm hoping it'll just be cold instead of insanely freezing while we're there.
• My sister is pregnant with her first son (also the first family grandbaby), and he'll be making his appearance sometime between now and April.  He's expected to be a preemie as she's only 6 months along and has gone into labor three times.  Please pray, send good vibes, or cross your fingers (whichever is your style) that my sister and her baby are happy and healthy.
• Brandon and I are having a May wedding and still have a considerable amount of planning to do.  Decorations still need to be finalized as well as who is going to decorate for us.  I have no idea who is going to do my hair or how I'm having it done.  Neither of my sisters (bridesmaids) nor the mothers (mine and his) have dresses picked out, let alone ordered or altered.  My dress needs the train cut off and the hem redone.  Food and drinks need to be figured out as well.  We've not had engagement photos taken or ordered invitations.  Half the guest list (his half) doesn't even have addresses.  I haven't found the shoes I intend to wear.  The list continues, but I keep reminding myself that I got through college as a procrastinator who works well under high pressure.  (Deep breaths!)
• Oh, then there's the honeymoon.  We haven't made any plans, but I won two "free" honeymoons through two different bridal shows, so that shouldn't be too difficult to take care of, in theory.  Mountains and/or the ocean will be involved!

Oh, Happy Day of Birth

I just realized that I haven't yet posted anything in November.  Over time, I am becoming increasingly slack in my responsibilities as a blogger and I apologize to you and to myself for that.
I last posted about my first meeting with my Big Brothers Big Sisters "Little".  Since that night, I have picked her up three more times to hang out.  We went to Boo at the Zoo where we collected candy, walked through part of a zombie-filled haunted house (and then turned and went back in the direction we came), and pet ginormous snakes (I did.  She didn't.).  We tried a new restaurant and found it to be delicious.  And, we've been to an arcade.  I think I might have to start being less cool so we can do less expensive activities...maybe bake cookies or make a craft together.  We'll see.
Also, I have become a fan of hockey!  I've attended two Evansville Icemen games and intend to continue to spectate whenever possible.  After my first game, I got to attempt to make a goal which I, of course, failed to do due to my lack of athletic ability.  However, a couple of my friends were more successful.  Last night, I took my dad to the game as my birthday present to him and it was great - the beer cups were filled from the bottom using a magnetic mechanism which is really cool and during the second period a double fight broke out.  Once the game ended, Dad and I quickly made our way onto the ice and found the bloodstain!
I again watched RunR play a great acoustic set this weekend.  It was spectacular, and I was reunited with members of DeafMegan who I haven't seen in at least four years.  I was also hit on by a middle-aged 'gentleman' who had enjoyed several adult beverages prior to my arrival at the estabishment.  Although this awkward encounter was rather unwanted at the time, it has made for a great story and was incredibly entertaining to those who witnessed it.
Today is my birthday and it has been better than expected.  I was awake almost before the sun and went to work.  Luckily, the day flew by and I was able to run a couple errands (playing with puppies at PetSmart and buying 'Lord of the Rings: Two Towers' from the $5 bin at WalMart) and be home just before the sun went to bed again.  I am now relaxing with my feet up while the puppies frolic with their toys and fret over the storm warnings.

If you enjoy my randomness, you might also like my dear friend's blog.

Thanks for checking in!

Recognizing Blessings

Through a very steady, cold, downpour I walked in the Race for the Cure this morning with my mom, younger sister, and her friend while another friend competed in the timed race. Our walk was long and drenching while his run was fast and accomplishing, earning him 26th place overall and 3rd place in our age range. Rather surprisingly, my team also succeeding in raising nearly $150 for Susan G. Komen for the Cure.

However, the more important event of the day was seeing both of my sisters. I wish my brother had been there too! There are days when I take my siblings for granted and don't appreciate them quite as much as I should. Today was not one of those days. I had not seen my older sister for at least three months, and so much has happened over the course of those three months that it seems like a lifetime. I talk to her and to our younger brother and sister often on the phone or through text messaging, but seeing them in person warms my heart and encourages me in ways I cannot describe. It's amazing how we support and take care of each other in ways that seem both completely natural and also extraordinary. My siblings are blessings in my life for which I thank God.

Focus on Forgiveness

I was challenged through December and the beginning of January to pick a word that would define my focus for 2011, and I chose "forgive".

Throughout this year I have struggled and grown both personally and spiritually in ways that I am very proud of, but I know I still have much to do.  A lot of this growth has been centered around my emotional battle to forgive those who have hurt me and to forgive myself for my own wrongs which I think is just as important.  I was talking recently with a friend about how as I forgive others I feel more at peace and happy, but since then I have been experiencing something that is making it necessary for me to re-forgive someone who has already been forgiven for so much that it is difficult.  However, I know that I have to because holding anger in my heart against someone really only punishes me.  Besides, as much as God forgives me for, it is my responsibility to forgive others just the same.

"For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses." Matthew 6:14-15

"Then Peter came up and said to him, “Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?” Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you seven times, but seventy times seven." Matthew 18:21-22

"Be merciful, even as your Father is merciful. “Judge not, and you will not be judged; condemn not, and you will not be condemned; forgive, and you will be forgiven." Luke 6:36-37

I can't upload the official music video for Chris August's "7x70" , so you'll have to deal with following the link provided or just reading the lyrics while you hear this song.

Before the Morning

This weekend has been very difficult and trying for my family and me for reasons I'm not yet ready to share with the entire world.  However, the services I attended this morning focused on Romans 8:28 and were very fitting for my mood and circumstances.  Coincidentally, the story of Job was also mentioned, and I happen to have read it just yesterday.

"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." - Romans 8:28

I then came home and began listening to Christian music while playing and snuggling with the puppies.  The song 'Before the Morning' by Josh Wilson spoke to me as well.

"Do you wonder why you have to,
feel the things that hurt you,
if there's a God who loves you,
where is He now?
~
Maybe, there are things you can't see
and all those things are happening
to bring a better ending
some day, some how, you'll see, you'll see
~
Would you dare, would you dare, to believe,
that you still have a reason to sing,
'cause the pain you've been feeling,
can't compare to the joy that's coming
~
so hold on, you got to wait for the light
press on, just fight the good fight
because the pain you've been feeling,
it's just the dark before the morning
~
My friend, you know how this all ends
and you know where you're going,
you just don't know how you get there
so say a prayer.
and hold on, cause there's good who love God,
life is not a snapshot, it might take a little time,
but you'll see the bigger picture
~
Would dare you, would you dare, to believe,
that you still have a reason to sing,
'cause the pain you've been feeling,
can't compare to the joy that's coming
~
so hold on, you got to wait for the light
press on, just fight the good fight
because the pain you've been feeling,
it's just the dark before the morning
yeah, yeah,
before the morning,
yeah, yeah
~
Once you feel the way of glory,
all your pain will fade to memory
once you feel the way of glory,
all your pain will fade to memory
memory, memory, yeah
~
Would dare you, would you dare, to believe,
that you still have a reason to sing,
'cause the pain you've been feeling,
can't compare to the joy that's coming
~
Would dare you, would you dare, to believe,
that you still got a reason to sing,
'cause the pain you've been feeling,
can't compare to the joy that's coming
~
com'n, you got to wait for the light
press on, just fight the good fight
because the pain you've been feeling,
it's just the hurt before the healing
the pain you've been feeling,
just the dark before the morning
before the morning, yeah, yeah
before the morning, yeah, yeah
before the morning"

"...Weeping may endure through the night,
but joy comes with the morning."

Psalm 30:5

We aren't meant to understand our circumstances in life, but we are meant to have faith and hope in God's unknown plans and in His love for us.

Beauty vs. Health

I think most of us can probably agree that society has a pretty skewed idea of beauty in relation to healthy weight.  Take a look below at a "normal" model's body compared to that of a "plus size" model.  It is my opinion that Nicole's body does not look like the body of a "normal" woman.  She is a beautiful girl and what I saw on America's Next Top Model made her seem like a sweetheart.  However, I think more woman can relate to Whitney's body type which allows her to fill out clothing more femininely and realistically.

Whitney Thompson
Cycle 10 Winner
America's Next Top Model
"Plus Size" Model

Nicole Fox
Cycle 13 Winner
America's Next Top Model
"Normal" Model

I have long found myself frustrated by media coverage of celebrities, scrutinizing them for weight gain or weight loss.  If we treasure these people so much for their ability to sing, act, direct, or write, why should their weight be so important? 

Maybe a cause of weight gain/loss is the stress of the limelight. Maybe these celebrities privately have health conditions or prescription medications that cause the weight gain/loss. Maybe they are human and shouldn't be required to fit into someone else's idea of perfection.

Most recently, I have seen numerous articles and pictures of LeAnn Rimes in which she is being attacked for being thin, but she doesn't look unhealthy to me.  She looks thin, yes, but muscular also.  She looks like she's been working out.  But, most importantly, she looks happy.  At least, she looks like she would be happy if everyone would back off.

LeAnn Rimes - June 2007
Celebrated for her abs.

LeAnn Rimes - May 2011
Called "Scary Skinny"
Probably only a 5-10 pound difference.

I feel that I should clarify that I'm not coming to LeAnn's defense because I'm her "biggest fan."  In all honesty, I can only name two songs of hers that I like.  (LeAnn, if you ever read this, it's not your music.  I'm just not a fan of country music.)  So, the issue isn't that people are picking on my favorite, it's that people need to have something better to do in life than harass others about their weight - or about anything else for that matter.

Our culture puts so much emphasis on being thin that girls (and boys) develop eating disorders and addictions to exercising in order to please their peers and find self worth.  According to the South Carolina Department of Mental Health, half of 11- to 13-year-old girls consider themselves to be overweight and eight of ten thirteen-year-olds have tried to lose weight. In a survey reported by the National Association of Anorexia Nervosa and Associated Disorders, the majority (91%) of women on a college campus had dieted in an attempt to control or lose weight.

An anorexic model on the runway.

How someone with anorexia views
the reflection in the mirror.

"The body type portrayed in advertising as the ideal is possessed naturally by only 5% of American females." (www.anad.org)